This is my blog, and it is dangerous. Do you think I want to die like this?

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

I Play Sims Asylum (part12)

"Now be a good boy and go stand in the shower fully clothed until somebody tries to burn the Asylum down..."
Great. The hot dogs are burnt again.
Alright, y'all, you know what to do - commence panicking.
Tip-top trepidation there, Arthur Derrick.
You're all precious gemstones.
Hey, do any of you mind if I do a little freestyle here?
Of course you don't. Check this shit out, I'm amazing. My vagina can do anything.
Oh yeah, sorry to have worn you out with the fire I didn't start, but managed to extinguish, Sweets.
You probably need a snack.
I think I might be doing the hot dog procedure incorrectly. I'm supposed to rub my food on a friend for extra flavor.
Well, this is embarrassing.
Ooh, Eve - you should know better than to eye up Rev's dog. Nobody's in the mood for anything tonight.
It's hard to find the words I need to ask about this.
Oh hey, thanks Arthur Derrick. You're a peach.
I don't know what I would have done without you to transfer the pile of filthy laundry ... over. A little.
Is the TV broken again? Couldn't we be watching literally anything else but this?
Here we go, a grand idea. Pillow fights are never not edifying.
You really detect the uplifting of her mind and character.
Even Lord Sweets is receiving some second-hand improvementations.
Not a moment too soon, either - he's been kicking up some naughtiness which is getting stuck right in my craw.
For one thing, I don't like having to catch any face-sass when I'm just trying to have a nice stare with one of my friends.
It makes it really hard to enjoy having my crotch intensely examined through my night shirt.

And he shouldn't be doing that thing with his neck. It's just fuckin' creepy and it gives Rev
permission to do whatever this thing she's doing is, which I kind of don't like much.
He's also started sitting like this. It's like trying to watch television next to someone who's
about to murder me with soft, lotioned hands and then knit a scarf from my hair. Or something.
He's gotta stop following me around, too.
He is really bleaching my bricks today. I'm about to do something bad with a sword.
Oh good, these two are the perfect distraction.
And I totally agree with you, too. We should throw a party. I hope somebody brings a platter of something.

I Play Sims Asylum (part13)
submit to reddit
add to saved by 0 users

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

I Play Sims Asylum (part11)

I was just thinking it would be a good idea to approach the new guy in my sleepwear and do some experiments on him.
His reaction to chest poking seems temperate.
It just appears to send him on a tear about vegetables.
Let's see what happens when I threaten to tweak his nipples.
Oops, Greg's here to break up my monkey business. He must be ready to dance.
"Greg, Greg, wait--"

"Easy on the thrusting this time. Think of the children."
Something certainly has me full of electricity today.
And just as quickly as it began, it's all over.
Greg, it would be just terrific if you could tell me how you managed to microwave a meal without a microwave.
Perfect, now I have to buy one, just to avoid some sort of Timecrowave situation.
It's for your own good, really. Bunny Walker can't abide paradoxes.
Whoa there, Busters. Especially you, new Buster.
For one thing, you've been doing quite a lot of belly-pointing since you arrived.
You're not the only one in here with pointing to do. Stop hogging the pointy finger.
Well, maybe Rev's not in the mood to point.
And these two, they're ... otherwise occupied, I guess.
Plus, I suppose it's safe to say Greg's pretty busy carrying around a bowl of something right now.
(I just hope he didn't get it from the microwave I haven't bought yet.)
Not to mention, Bunny seems to be concentrating all of her efforts on hating everyone.
And Husbro prefers to skulk up behind people most of the time ...
Alright, ya scamp. You can be the one who points at us. Just stop bugging me when I'm trying to poop, okay?
Or I will totes pull this thing out of your chest for real.
Now, be a good boy and go stand in the shower fully clothed until somebody tries to burn the Asylum down.
I Play Sims Asylum (part12)
submit to reddit
add to saved by 0 users

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Magic Jinn

My face, everyone.

submit to reddit
add to saved by 0 users