I Play Sims (part22)

Gnomes, huh?

I'm sure you're wondering what Suri and Stanley have been up to.  Well, I'll tell you. 

Stanley has been rage sculpting in his underwear on the uppermost balcony.

Stanley's also taken over all of the family's repair work.

Although, sometimes he does his repairs while fully clothed.

...and there's always his garden.

Suri has started night busking downtown, which is a lot like day busking, except with a bluish tinge.

Now that Rachel has so much leisure time from being the head of the company, she's decided to go to Shang Simla, where she's studying martial arts.

Oh god, now she's just showboating.

Rachel, that doesn't even begin to make any sense.

Hey, Rachel - guess what?!

Rachel's so excited, she gets ready for the party right away.

I think it would be fairly difficult to find something she didn't like.

Everyone's upstairs, so that's where Rachel heads.  The first thing she notices is her friend Justin Kayes and some other dude, nerding out over something above the fireplace.

Alright, Rachel, you're over-dressed - by about a mile.

And he's getting away!  Go after him, he's made it all the way to the front porch!

Looks like he's been just fantastic.

The next day is Suri's birthday and Rachel pulls out all the stops.

Stay tuned for the party, and the big move.

I Play Sims (part23)

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I Play Sims (part20)

I know I've said this before, but I don't think this one is any good.  At all.  We're talking polished turd.  Penis pie.  There's a reason, though.

As I've told a couple of you, I built the Rosenzweigs a new home, from the foundation up.  I know absolutely nothing about architecture and I'm intensely anal retentive about details, so I spent the better part of two and a half weeks obsessing over everything from the pitch of the roof to the tiny lights on the porch railings and every little scrap of fabric on every piece of furniture and on and on and on.

Once the house was built, all I wanted to do was move the family in.  Once I moved them in, all I wanted to do was hurry up and get through the remaining backlog of stories, so I could finally start playing them in that house.  Which brings me to the reason this story sucks: I'm phoning it in.  Also: I suck.  I haven't felt very inspired lately.  Some people find that misery fuckstarts their muse.  That's not always the case with me.  Sometimes it makes me a giant bore.

Alright, here we go.  No need to buckle up.

----      

Rachel, in a fit of doing exactly the same thing she always does, decides it's time to return to Champs Les Sims, France for a vacation.  Ah, France ... so beautiful, so romantic, so ... so ...

Sew buttons on your underwear.  Hm.  Why did I think a barely funny verbal retort from Little House on the Prairie was going to work in text?  Oh, right.  I'm out of my fucking mind.

Alright, you know the drill - let's get moving.  The time for adventure is now.

At least, I don't think they do.
 

While you're at it, don't forget to make small talk with the statues.

Wow, that was quick.  You just blazed through that tomb.

Now might be a good time to meet a local.

Follow him, Rachel.  If I've learned anything, it's that it won't be weird.

Now we've just got to figure out why, instead of jogging around this bathroom in urgent urinary desperation, he doesn't just use another.

You two seriously might want to consider interrupting your bathroom klatch for just one minute.

What does it take to get these two to notice that this dude has just pissed at their feet?


Maybe Egypt would be a better choice, Rachel.  Let's go there.

Come to think of it, Rachel, a shower is a good idea - go get washed up and do something fun fun fun fun

I Play Sims (part21)

Explained in comments.  Sorta.