Ke$ha - without Autotune

In general, I hate Autotune.  It's fricking everywhere anymore.  I hate it the most when it's used to fix the fact that someone can't sing in tune.  For whatever reason, I can tolerate the way Ke$ha uses it.  This isn't to imply I'm some sort of rabid fan - I don't even own any of her music.

What's my point?  I fucking have one, I promise. 

I just realized that people are freaking out over a clip of her singing without Autotune, as though it proves that she cannot sing.  I listened to clip:



If it's been removed by the time you try to listen, just do a search for "Kesha without Autotune" singing Your Love is My Drug and I'm sure you'll find that it's popped up again.

What the clip proved to me is that Ke$ha actually can sing - she's no Mariah Carey, but I've had my fill of melismatic runs, thank you very much - yet practically everyone commenting was cackling like a half- drunk monkey, as though the fact that she didn't sound like a robot without the benefit of Autotune proved she was a hack.  I took leave of my senses for long enough to comment.  I know, I know.

"I don't get what everyone is so excited about. She's actually singing IN TUNE. I think everyone is just so used to hearing people auto-tuned, they don't know what real voices sound like anymore."

I wake up the next day to someone helpfully schooling me on the finer points of singing.

"@NicoMorley there's a big difference between singing in key and singing in tune. she is not singing in tune."

Pull the pitch pipe out of your ass for a moment, huggy3ear, and explain to me how someone would be able to sing in the correct key the song was written in, without being able to sing in tune - which Ke$ha is doing.   But really, thank god you were there to so eloquently explain the big difference between two things which are essentially the same.  God knows I've never taken a single choir class in my life - I'd hate to stumble blindly into a comment section, try to self-importantly correct someone else and make an ass of myself in the process.  Close call.

No to Katy, but hell yes to Ke$ha.

Why?  I think the looming and obvious answer is that Ke$ha doesn't try to pull any of that cutesy little girl crap, all mixed in with her sexuality - she's not trying to have her cupcake tits and eat 'em too.  She's picked what she's going to be, and she's sticking with it:

Total scuzzball - and I'm okay with that.  I'm kinda scuzzy myself, so maybe it's a tribal thing - you know, I'm recognizing one of my kind or something.  Don't get me wrong - I'm about as anal retentive as they come.  I will organize the shit out of my closet, and don't even think about messing with my system.  But I will also go to bed with makeup on without a second though - and you really don't want to enter a "who can go the longest without a shower" contest because I will soundly defeat you.  I could probably even beat Ke$ha.

This isn't to say that I'm not slightly embarrassed to admit that I dig on some Ke$ha songs - but not nearly as embarrassed as I'd be to admit to enjoying Katy Perry's music - which I don't.  Katy Perry's a good singer - but her music is, for the most part, completely vile.  It's the difference between, "I'll refer to your penis in a cutesy and euphemistic manner ... teehee, my tits shoot whipped cream!" and "Alright, you can come party with us - but you'll probably shit glitter for a month, so don't say you ain't been warned." 

Maybe there's something wrong with me, but I'd much rather party with the dumpster diving dirty freak who's wearing crap on her face that looks like it came out of my craft drawer.  I just think I'd have more fricking fun with her.  She'd probably have boots I could borrow, and wouldn't be a little priss about sharing her hairbrush.

Ke$ha's also not under the misapprehension that she has an important message to impart - there's no pretension.  She's aware of the fact that she makes pop music.  I don't see her all over the place yapping about her "process" or thinking we need to hear every damned fart that comes out of her brain.  

Katy Perry makes me groan for womankind.  Ke$ha makes me wish I was still young enough to go clubbing without it being a potentially pathetic scene.  So, Ke$ha, with your bad self - do continue.