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This is my blog, and it is dangerous. Do you think I want to die like this?





Monday, December 13, 2010

Well, at least the view is nice from my grave ...

We've all been in situations that suck with a silver lining.  Or lived through times that were almost unbearable, except for a few small shiny spots.  One of those, "I live alone in a tiny, roach-infested apartment in a part of town so horrible I'm afraid to leave after dark, but I have plenty of glue and rhinestones so at least I was able bedazzle the hell out of the roaches so my horror is kind of fabulous" type situations.

Now, I wouldn't dare to assert that I have it worse that someone else, or that people should feel really, really sorry for me.  But I don't exactly have it easy.  I'm 100% isolated from friends and my family, and never leave the apartment for fun.  It's been over two years since I've gone out to do anything socially (there are several reasons for why this has come to pass, each one more boring than the last).  When I explain this to people, it doesn't seem to hold any real meaning for them, but trust me when I tell you, it makes you go nucking futs.

So, I'm kind of stuck in our apartment slowly losing my mind - and since we're on a night shift schedule, we're at the mercy of the rest of the world when it comes to our sleep.  As an added bonus, while we're on the 1st floor, the 3rd floor apartment appears to be doomed to be occupied only by human representations of drunk or retarded penises.  But, at least I could (operative word) always count on the apartment manager to uphold the very strict written rules about noise disturbances, even if he wasn't there every time something happened. 
Allow me to give you some background about this situation which you care not a whit about (seriously, if you're still reading, you're either my mother or my other mother).

When we first moved in, our upstairs (2nd floor) neighbors would play very loud, bass-heavy music during the day.  It rattled our apartment and my nerves, because not only did it wake me up early almost every day, but I was also in constant fear of it waking one of the kids up during their naps.  When I contacted the apartment manager about it, he came to witness the noise level in our apartment and said something akin to, "This will not continue."

Well, one day the music started after the office was closed, and while the kids were napping.  I'd reached the end of my desperation/stress rope, so I went upstairs, knocked and introduced myself and begged them to turn their music down.  They were extremely nice about the whole thing, and from then on, I never heard their music again. 

From that point, up until now, the only noise issues I've had have been with that accursed 3rd floor apartment.  I've also never - up until now - had any issues with the apartment manager or office staff.  In fact, I've always felt they were better than average.

Here's where I finally get to the fucking point.  Recently, the 2nd floor started playing their music again.  I don't know why.  Maybe it's in reaction to their new obnoxious upstairs neighbors (since the original people have since been evicted).  All I know is that it was waking us up early (it's important to note that the music appears to originate from their master bedroom) and threatening my children's naps again.  Since we think they're nice people, and didn't want to "report" them to the apartment manager, my husband wrote them a note asking them to please turn down the bass in their music.  But, the music continued. 

So, as my apartment rattled, I called the manager to explain the situation.  Since the music was currently playing, he came by.  As he stood in my livingroom, listening to my upstairs neighbors music, he said something to me that just did not compute, when compared with everything I'd been told before, including what I'd read in the Community Policies and Procedures handout.

"This is pretty normal for an apartment.  I'll go up there and see if they have a speaker sitting on the floor, but there's really nothing we can do about it, if they're not playing it at an unreasonable hour."

Mind you, I wasn't asking for these people to be kicked out, or even chastised.  I was standing there agreeing with him that they were very nice people, but explaining that even with white noise machines and ear plugs, their "pretty normal for an apartment" music was still able to wake me and my family up.  All I was asking of him was that he agree that the music - which was just as loud as it was the first time he came and agreed it was too loud - was still unacceptably loud.

He was changing the rules.  He was saying that now the music had to be played after 10pm for it to be too loud, even if it was knocking china out of cabinets.  Well, let me quote directly from the handout I was given when I moved in: "Radios, steroes, TVs and musical intruments must be played so that they cannot be heard outside or inside the adjoining apartments."  That says nothing about time of day, just that the noise you make in your apartment should not be heard outside of it.

What's driving me so bitchshit batcakes about this is that the one thing I felt I could count on was the management being responsive, consistent and fair.  I wasn't asking for something unreasonable - I was even making it clear that we'd tried to deal with it ourselves, didn't want to make a big deal about it, and that if it hadn't been a matter of my family's sleep, I wouldn't be saying anything at all.  And he was telling me he could change the rules whenever he felt like it.

I used to feel protected by good apartment management - now I feel like anything can happen here.

My roaches have lost their rhinestones.
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5 comments:

E. Studnicka said...

When life hands you lemons...
...wait until they're nice and squishy then chuck 'em at your neighbors whilst laughing satanically and screaming "Are ya feeling the beat now PUNK?!.
That's what I always say.

Unknown said...

Well. I guess we won't be having any lemonade today, then.

Madeline Hammersmark said...

Yes, we have no bananas.

erin said...

your horror IS fabulous! i wish i'd had your roach-bedazzling chutzpah while living alone in my own shitty basement and working the graveyard shift. hope the living situation gets better for you though.

Unknown said...

Perhaps. But I've never worn a studded collar. So there's that.